Atheism and Absurdity [04/06/01]

I find it is a common pastime for many people to criticize theistic religions such as Christianity. But what about atheism? It seems to cleverly slip past the watchful eye of common sense-- riding in the wake of the success of the Scientific Method. However you must realize that in order to be an atheist, you must follow a particular line of "rational", logical thought. And once this system of thought is extended to its rational limits, the very concept of hard-line atheism becomes rather absurd.

Poking holes in the religious system that is known as Christianity (as it's commonly practiced) is like shooting fish in a barrel. For example: you needn't be too clever to illustrate how concepts such as Original Sin and "God the Sometimes Merciful Father (not mother) who Also Sometimes Gets Very Angry" are philosophically absurd and an insidious remnant from an era in history when judgmental tyrants ruled the Middle East. This is not to say that I don't respect Christianity-- because I do. But most Christians desparately avoid any analysis of their religion for fear of "rocking the boat" and simply censor out the unpleasant parts. This, of course, creates an easy (and tempting?) target for any reasonably educated non-Christian who wishes to do a little Jesus-bashing. Of course this is an ill-informed approach since Jesus was probably a cool guy... but I digress.

However, atheists are harder to tackle. They can always invoke Science to generally excuse themselves from philosophical discussion, since metaphysics is usually not the domain of the "rational man". Any philosophy that delves deeper than the level of human or social psychology is seen as inconsequential or purely unnecessary.

Now in my less forgiving moods, I am tempted to categorize hard-core atheists along with radical Bible-thumpers and developmentally challenged children... but that would not be fair to belittle children in such a manner. But since I'm in a pleasant mood, let's do some analysis.

Now, to be a "true" atheist (and likely Darwinist) you must believe the following:

ALL the evolution of the universe, at all levels, is "just by accident"... The gravity that allows galaxies to form, the coherence of stars, the laws that dictate the formation of planets, the growth of microbial life on Earth that eventually generated the entire human race... is all by accident; Just a pure coincidence of interacting blind matter, propelled by blind energy, following fairly arbitrary laws. As you go up the chain of complexity, the coincidences keep getting more clever, until finally... logically... you arrive at human consciousness. Your mind. That very thing that identifies you as who you are and defines the scope of your whole reality. And this You and your *entire world* are just a logical fluke... a happy coincidence of so many Newtonian bits of stuff. So all your mind, your thoughts, feelings, love, creativity, intellect and your very sense of self and ego... is just a big coincidence. It all means nothing. And when you die, you just fall apart into your component parts and dissolve and you become nothing-- which is not surprising, since you weren't really anything even when you were alive. Just a clever Meat Automaton who seeks out to spread its chemical genetic code sequence in an exponential fashion, so that more clever hunks of matter can be created for the future. And note that when you become "nothing", that doesn't mean Nothing in the profound Zen sense... no, it means nothing, as in: you get locked in a sensory depravation tank for 40 billion years until the Universe expires due to the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics. And then after the universe dies, other shit may happen, but YOU certainly won't be around to see any of it, or be a part of it, because *you will be DEAD*. Remember... once you're dead, that what was you-- being your brain --is now broken and gone. Your body chemicals have still flowed back into the mechanical ecosystem (thus allowing an eco-sensitive brand of atheism to develop...) but YOU are gone forever, and YOU will never again experience any emotion or inspiration or happiness of any kind because you have been locked in the black box of eternal death where there are no more experiences to be had. The universe was One Big Accident and if you happen to die, in the long run, no one will really notice because you weren't worth much to begin with-- besides the $3 worth of chemicals that comprise the human body.

Remember this clearly the next time you fall in love. Remember that the "love" feeling you experience is all just a logically expected accident of evolution to increase the likelihood of pair bonding. And also, the next time a family member dies, remember that your grief is all an evolutionary response to a member of the herd dying, since every member of the herd has a similar genome. It's not "real" in any sense. It is merely the interaction of electrical pulses traveling along your brain axons. Every emotion from grief to love is all merely a result of the patterns in your head-meat. It has no significance at all-- just biology. As a human being, you are merely an advanced form of fungus that grew on this dirty ball of rock known as the Earth.

Of course clever humans can figure out the tricks of this coincidental world, because it just so happens that the chaos of reality is actually governed by many set laws. Darn it, those electrons have some funny tricks! All matter follows the same laws, and the more laws you can figure out, the better chance you have at predicting NEW laws. And the more laws you accumulate, the better mankind can conquer Nature... so we can more efficiently fight and struggle against the hostile and indifferent world. And through medicine, we may not die quite so soon (because we all know what Death leads to!!!). This noble purpose is worth fighting for because it is imperative for our species to continue living! Although no one is quite sure why-- without resorting to those "sketchy" electrical pulses known as emotions: i.e. we must keep up our struggle against nature so that our children can have a better world... and we love our children... but love is just a fluky brain configuration... so then I suppose what's the point?

So that is my extension of the atheist universe in a nutshell. It beckons to those who have the courage to embrace the Hard Facts of Nature. Unfortunately is has the side-effect of stripping people of their wonder for life and spiritual vitality... but the atheist universe remains the most reasonable choice because it supposedly makes sense to Science and mathematical logic. The public is supposed to come to their senses and come running because, in addition, popular religion has everyone disillusioned. Since you generally only get two choices --God or No God-- once you discard your traditional faith, you revert to the "default" that is atheism.

I would suggest an alternative means of evaluating your reality. The world of the walking DNA Meat Robots is not much better than the world of Sky Daddy who Watches and Smites. I think I'll read a few good books then try and figure it out for myself, thanks.